Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
