pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize