Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
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I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
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I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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