There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
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Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
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I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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