If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
