Don't you send me to vm
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize