just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
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does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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