At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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