You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
