Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
