He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
