He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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