do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I didn't shave. On purpose
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
