So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
