so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
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