Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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