no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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