***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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