I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
my being single is dangerous.
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Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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