I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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