Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
