i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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