Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
