when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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