ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
