There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
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