You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
