wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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