But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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