Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
