i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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