I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
