I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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