She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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