I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
