where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Guys Hate When Girls Do These 29 Cringeworthy Things
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash