You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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