I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Randomize
