therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
