If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
You were trust falling into bushes
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
