They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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