ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
