I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i love accidental penises.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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