I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
