brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
