whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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