How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
