found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm sobbing to NWA
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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