Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
