we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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