I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
did i walk over a car last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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